2. Why We Wait: Fear, Family, and the Path We Didn’t Choose

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The Story Beneath the Silence

If you’ve ever hesitated before telling someone you write poetry, sing at night, or dream of illustrating children's books—you're not alone. That hesitation often holds a deeper story.

Maybe your family didn’t understand creative work. Maybe you were taught that art was a luxury, not a life. Maybe financial pressures meant you had to be practical—no time to chase dreams when rent is due.

Or maybe, even deeper down, there was fear. Fear of failure. Fear of not being “good enough.” Fear of looking foolish for trying.

These reasons don’t make you weak. They make you human.

The Weight of Expectations

Many of us were handed scripts early in life:
“Be a doctor.”
“Get a real job.”
“Art won’t pay the bills.”
“You’re too sensitive for that kind of life.”

So, we followed the script. We got degrees, took stable jobs, built lives that looked good on paper. And we told ourselves we’d circle back to our creative passions eventually—when we had more time, more money, more permission.

But life keeps moving. And eventually, we wonder: Did I wait too long?

The Role of Responsibility

For some, putting creativity on hold wasn’t about fear—it was about love. Parents took jobs they didn’t enjoy to support children. First-generation college graduates carried the weight of family hopes. Many of us made decisions with others in mind.

There is honor in that.

And yet, even the most dutiful life can leave a quiet ache. That longing to return to something that felt like you.

Fear Has a Voice—But So Does Creativity

It’s important to recognize the voice of fear when it shows up. It often sounds like:

• “I’m too old to start.”

• “What if I’m not talented?”

• “Everyone else is already ahead of me.”

But you know what else has a voice? Your creativity.
It whispers.
It hums when you see a paintbrush, hear a melody, read a line of poetry that takes your breath away.

Even if it’s quiet, it never disappears. That’s how you know it’s still yours.

You’re Not Alone in the Waiting

The truth is, many of the most inspiring creative people didn’t start when they were young. They started when they were ready. Sometimes that means beginning at 30, 40, 50, or 60. Sometimes that means starting after a divorce, a career change, or an empty nest.

You’re not late. You’re just beginning from a place of lived experience.

And that depth? That emotion? That hard-won perspective?

It’s your creative superpower.

You Still Get to Choose

No matter how long it’s been, the choice to create is still yours. Not out of obligation, but out of longing. Not to prove anything, but to reconnect with the part of you that has waited patiently to be heard.

You can choose to begin with a single sketch. A single note. A single sentence. You don’t need to quit your job or make some grand announcement. You just need to say yes, even quietly.

You still get to choose your path. Even now.

If This Resonated With You…

• Write down one creative thing you loved doing before life got busy.

• Ask yourself: What’s one small way I could do that again this week?

• Know that this space exists to support you, not rush you. You're right on time.

If you grew up in an environment where attitudes towards creativity weren't understood, or where the idea of having a career in a creative field wasn't taken seriously, you may find the following books helpful:

1. Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents: How to Heal from Distant, Rejecting, or Self-Involved Parents by Lindsay C. Gibson, PsyD

2. Recovering from Emotionally Immature Parents: Practical Tools to Establish Boundaries and Reclaim Your Emotional Autonomy by Lindsay C. Gibson, PsyD

3. Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself by Dr. Kristen Neff

4. Wishcraft: How to Get What You Really Want by Barbara Sher

5. The Art of Aliveness: A Creative Return to What Matters Most by Flora Bowley

Coming soon - Post # 3: Small Starts: How to Reconnect with Your Creative Side